Swearing a sign of a poor vocabulary? Bullshit!

It's a 'dirty' habit that almost everyone engages in, though many deny it. A linguistic subculture we choose to view as black and white, seemingly filled with teetotalers at one end of the spectrum and gluttons at the other. Those who engage in it publicly do it with relish, those who oppose it seem to live their lives in a constant state of disgusted anger. It's swearing. Good, old fashioned cussing, cursing, gutter mouth filthy language. There are some who believe that swearing is a sign of a poor vocabulary. They, my friends, are fools.

The tired idea of swearing being indicative of a poor vocabulary is a sweeping generalization that has never been proven true. People who use swear words profusely may indeed have a poor vocabulary but not everyone who swears is a functional illiterate. If anything, people who would exclude any type of words - be it swear words or agricultural terms - are purposely dwindling down their vocabulary. And that would be more indicative of a wilted vocabulary than the appropriate use of select words.

It's a swear word's power that makes it so irrepressible and indispensable. Writers have used swearing throughout the years to get a point across and so-called 'gutter language' is no stranger to the realm of classical literature. Shakespearean plays, for example, were considered beyond bawdy and downright offensive when first released. Shakespeare seemed particularly smitten with throwing the word "Zounds" around, as it appears some 23 times in his works, with 10 of those occurring in 1 Henry IV alone. Of course, now Zounds sounds like something you might expect to find in a dog eared crackerjack crime fighter comic from the 1950s but, at the time, it was one of the most offensive words of the day. The word, short for God's Blood, was considered extremely offensive as it referred to the wounds or blood of Christ, a subject that was largely considered taboo and blasphemous. Another word with generally the same meaning but slightly less offensive was "'Sblood" which claims an additional 12 occurrences in Shakespeare's work.

For those who prefer to address only the current collection of expletives, consider John Steinbeck, whose classic Of Mice And Men has been banned in schools due to its offensive language. Other classics which have met the curriculum chopping block over foul language include Lord of the Flies, Slaughterhouse-Five, Ordinary People, and even James and the Giant Peach. Each one is a classic in its own right and most have been widely read and loved by the general public. And why do people read books? Because they enjoy the story and, in particular, the way in which it is written.

Don't misunderstand me - I can appreciate the concept of the correct time and place to engage in swearing. I wouldn't use the word 'shit' in front of preschoolers, but I wouldn't use the words 'lynching' or 'filibuster' around them either. Swearing isn't something you can just jump into. As children develop their vocabularies, they have a tendency to treat all words equally. They have no hesitation when speaking and haven't developed the art of thinking before they speak.

All words contain power. We can call someone a "killer" or we can call them an "assassin". The two words are synonyms for one another, but each words conjures up a unique mental image. The same goes for word comparisons like attack / bludgeon, thin / papery and neutralize / thwart. Chances are you'd rather argue than fight and you'd prefer to be described as sensitive rather than touchy. And, while synonyms for other words flow freely from our brain, a thesaurus for swearing would be, more than likely, shockingly thin. Some of our more well-known swear words encompass ideas more than simple words. "Asshole" means, in loose terms, a bad person, someone who may be rude or thoughtless, callous - but none of those words really sum it up as succinctly as asshole does.

When swearing is used appropriately, it can paint a vivid and, more importantly, accurate depiction of life. While it's true that swearing, like any other aspect of human behavior, can be over done it's definitely not something that should be regulated and hidden away so ardently that the world is deprived of works of classical literature, or the opportunity to devise their own.

But, still, people will tell you that swearing is simply unbearable. It's offensive and crass and exposes those around you to mental anguish from the sheer horror of it all. In fact, there are times when the reaction to swearing is more offensive than the words themselves could ever be. Cuss Control Academy, based out of Chicago, has made it its mission to eradicate America's "addiction to swearing" and for a mere $1,500 you can have a seminar in the greater Chicago area ($2,500 plus expenses for other areas). CCA claims swearing "reflects ignorance", "discloses a lack of character" and can even "lead to violence", though they don't offer up any substantiating evidence for these claims. CCA isn't alone in this ideology. Those with a negative opinion about swearing will be the first ones to fall back on the old "swearing shows a lack of vocabulary" argument, though they too seem to be unable to offer up any proof. Considering how wide spread the act of swearing is, trying to draw parallels between cursing and a propensity to violence would be like drawing a correlation between violent offenders and their peanut butter consumption.

No matter how vast your vocabulary is, some people are still assholes and some situations merit the expletive 'shit'. This is a simple fact of life and one I wish people wouldn't be so quick to shy away from. The main objections seem to be centered around the vocabulary issue and the fact that the words are themselves are somehow 'dirty'. Well, life is dirty, isn't it? Why should our language be anything less? The fact of the matter is, swearing is simply another part of our rich language. Humans are dirty, gritty beings and life is never simple enough to be reduced down to simplistic, easy to swallow words. And, personally, I wouldn't have it any other way.